Our Constant Drama /OCD

Ace of Cakes

2009-06-08T19:57:00.000-07:00

When I asked Owen what he wanted on his cake for his third birthday, he answered "backhoe." So, a google search of 'backhoe cake' got me started. The end result was not only a backhoe, but a dumptruck as well. Crazy, yes. Fun, yes!

As you can see the dirt is crushed Oreo cookies and chopped chocolate bars.

Mini-donuts, white chocolate, colored licorice and M&M's, for decorations.

For this cake I used a store-bought pound cake cut. To hold up the licorice "arms" there are bamboo skewers cut to length. (I think next time I will also use a tiny piece of licorice to join the arms.)

For the dump truck, I made my own pound cake and cut it per specs found online. Not bad for the first time out, but the proportion of grill to windows is off somewhat...

I made cream cheese frosting to cover and "glue" pieces together.

You can see I put each cake on it's own foil-covered cardboard for storage in the refrigerator (a side-by-side), and then onto a larger one for display (which would have fit in a full-size refrigerator).

The birthday boy reaching for his favorite part, the chocolate!

Also in the works for the infamous "next time" are working parts, construction signs, rock piles, and even construction workers. We'll see.

A Two-Year Old's Day

2008-11-15T07:32:00.000-08:00

It was a bad day for Owen. I will share three of the highlights, or maybe lowlights, of this day. (There might have been more.)

The kids weren't up for too long when Owen came up from the basement crying. I asked him what happened and he said, "Ahva did it." (Ahva=Ava) I asked him, "What did Ava do?" Owen said, in his robot voice, "Ucker me. Eye." As he pointed to his eye, I see it is swollen and red. I asked again what did Ava do. "Ucker me. Eye." I asked him if Ava 'uckered' him and he nodded. I couldn't figure out what 'ucker' meant. So, I called the perpetrator.

Ava reluctantly came upstairs and I asked her, "What did you do to Owen?" After a brief explanation of what the fight was about, she concluded with, "...so, I threw my candy at him." Although I knew the answer at this point, I still had to ask. "What type of candy was it?" Ava answered, "A sucker." Ouch. Three days later, there is still a red mark.

The second event, though not as painful, cost me a yardstick. My good one, too. It was a full 48", not the actual 36" yardstick. I think the increased length is what got Owen into trouble with this one. Again, Ava and Owen were playing together, this time in my bedroom. Ava was playing piano, and Owen was, well, testing the limits of the yardstick. (Which I got out to center a wall hanging, so it is really MY fault he had it.) I hear a loud crack and Ava screaming for me to come. I run in there and see Owen crying, standing on my rocker/recliner in the corner, with the broken yardstick behind him. He is holding the back of his bare leg saying "owie", so I ask Ava to explain this one. She says Owen was sitting on the stick and it broke. With more questions, I established that Owen had put the stick across the arms of the chair and when he was sitting solely on the stick, it caved. Luckily, no real injury out of that one besides maybe a tiny splinter?

Our third trauma could have been life-threatening. Take it from the girl who stuck a key into an outlet at age 4. Maybe it's in the genes? I was touching up some paintings on the wall that had been annoying me for some time. I stood in front of the humidifier in our bedroom, not wanting to move that to get at the paintings. I don't think it was running, but it was plugged in. Owen was playing at my feet. What I didn't know was that Owen had a penny. As you are putting the pieces together in your head, it probably didn't go down as you are thinking. All of a sudden, there were sparks flying, the blue kind, and smoke. I screamed because I was right in front of the outlet. A loud pop and a fuse was blown. The girls were crafting in the kitchen and when the lights went out they screamed, too. It all was only seconds long, but I looked down to see Owen still holding the penny and the humidifier still plugged in. He had wedged the penny in between the plastic plug and the wall, the penny touching both prongs of the plug-in. I grabbed Owen (who was crying), and the penny. When I finally looked at the penny, I saw the two grooves where the posts had been, and some blackness where it was burned. Wow. (And yes, I am saving the penny.)

Well, that was one day. I am glad we have more. And I am glad we have God's protection over us!

I am fairly certain after posting this, that they will take back my "Mother of the Year" trophies. That is, what's left of them.

One of those days

2008-08-27T09:48:00.001-07:00

You know those days when the dishwasher doesn't clean the dishes completely, the dryer takes two cycles to get the clothes dry, you are out of bread, milk and dog food, the kids tell you they don't have any clean clothes, your library books are overdue -- one is lost somewhere-- and you can't renew them online because your internet is down for the third day in a row, you feel PMS coming on, the broken sink sprayed you in the face when you went to wash the two-year old's hands after he found out for himself his diaper needed changing, there are what seem like a hundred beads on the floor after your four year old spilled the container her older sisters were using for their craft -- and when you move the chair to sweep them up, you see someone spilled ice cream the night before and didn't tell anyone, the phone rings (which you don't even think about picking up at this point) and some recorded message is playing on the answering machine again saying you have been pre-approved, it is getting cloudy and cool so the kids are now inside wanting to "do" something, so you decide to give up trying to clean anything and watch a movie with them, only to find that you don't have any clean bowls for popcorn because the dishwasher didn't work! Yeah, I'm there.

Just Another Day

2008-02-24T16:14:00.000-08:00

On this day, my oldest two girls went tubing with a group of kids from church (well, not all were from our church, but they all left from our church anyway!). But, of course you can guess that my day just wasn't that simple. After all, I'm blogging about it, right?
Again, my story begins with my husband informing me the night before that no, he would not be coming with us, nor would he stay home to watch the younger two so that I could go tubing with the girls. (An impending snowmobiling trip had hurried his need to fix his snowmobile.) I had invited friends to go tubing, and I was looking forward to spending a day catching up with a good friend. (Not much adult conversation here!) I even asked my mom if she could watch the younger ones, but she was working that day. And I already got the "don't ask my mom" speech from the husband, being as they just got back from vacation.
To my surprise, and with no assistance from my husband, we were at the church 35 minutes early! EARLY! No one else was there, only the bus driver's vehicle and what looked like Pr. Jim's truck in front. So we waited. Cherished the moment so-to-speak.
Finally, the girls let me leave and I was off to find jeans that fit and were going to last longer than one year. (This was only decided after sitting in the van in my "skinny" jeans for too long.) We went to JCPenney and found some jeans, but not after dressing room fiasco number two. (The first one having been at the ones in the kids section, where Owen kept walking in front of the sensor and dinging the bell over and over and over, until people were starting to stare. I was sure they couldn't see Owen which made it more interesting.) Owen could not be kept in the stall with me, and I don't even know why I thought he would. I had to run out with my pants undone, because I heard the ding of the bell that meant he had left the dressing rooms. Indeed, it was funny for everyone who happened to see us, but for me, not so much.
After two fall-down fits from Owen, me dropping the clothes in my arms three times - and then stepping on them once, trying to find Owen four times and finding Ava lying down on the benches in the shoe department because she was tired (unbeknownst to me), I ended up with a three dollar shirt for me, two pairs of nylons, a cute little spring outfit for Ava, a little white shirt (for Ava), and three Easter dresses besides the jeans I came for. No, not all on the list, I know. A passing glance on the way out the first time revealed that the girls’ dresses were 50% off, today only. (Because you know they will never be on sale again.) Still a bit more than I would like to spend, but comparable to Target's prices at 50% off, I decided to go for it. This year we will look like we put thought into it! Hopefully Jeremy won't mind...
We then went to BK drive-thru to get lunch to eat at Grandma's, even though it was only 11 :00. I thought that getting a "king sized" meal would suffice the two kids. Wow, was I naïve! The monster cup filled with Hi-C was a little top heavy, so much so that it tipped out of my holder and spilled under my feet while driving. Well, not all of it. The rest spilled at my parent's house when I knocked it over on the counter reaching for a glass. This was when I learned that the food dye in that drink is industrial strength! I had to get out three different cleaners before I got the red stain off the white counter. This made me decide to never, ever, get Hi-C again.
Not sure why this surprised me, but when I finally got to eat, I saw that I got the wrong sandwich and my York peppermint pie was missing (that was an impulse buy anyway). I didn't care at that point. The food was still warm, that's what mattered.
I hardly finished eating when I needed to change a stinky diaper. Owen had been a wild man that day, and it was probably a good thing that I grabbed him when I did. Let's just say, fruit scented lotion looks like yogurt to a year-and-a-half year old. Plus, my dad was there trying to fix a computer – which wasn't going so well. I just wanted things to stay on the down low and somewhat quiet. It wasn’t happening.
When I changed Owen in the bathroom, I saw Reader's Digest had a story entitled 10 Ways To Be REALLY Happy (or something close to that). I think, “I know the true source of happiness, but I bet that’s not in there.” (Insert reality check here.) At that exact same time Owen tried to get up and I was nowhere near finished wiping, so you can fill in the blanks. Let’s say I REALLY had to think about the true source of happiness because I wasn't feeling it at that moment.
To sum up the short time at Grandma's: Ava spilled red Hi-C on the couch, Owen had spit out the nuts from peanut M&M's all over the floor in the kitchen (after he secretly pushed a stool over to the counter to get them), I saw my white shirt was also stained with red Hi-C (that was now dry), and Owen almost ran off with a hand-blown glass pitcher. And yes, there is more to tell but it pretty much went like this, "Owen! No! No! Give me that!"
I couldn't take it anymore; and frankly, neither could my dad. We all ended up leaving at the same time. I decided to take the long way to ensure sleep in the wild child. We had almost an hour and half until the bus was due back, and I was wondering what to do. End destination: Target. Owen slept in the cart; Ava and I shopped in peace. I saw a container that would be perfect for my laundry soap, so I put it under the cart, the only place for it. We picked up a few dollar items and some clearance hat and mittens, and spent the rest of the time talking to my cousin's wife's mom we met in the toy section. (We could talk for days, easily.) Since I don't wear a watch, and didn't have my phone, I had no idea what time it was. I joked to the lady in the 10 items or less aisle that I had 11 items, and then we were finally headed out to the van. I hit a bump in the lot which woke up Owen, and my container went sliding out. Oh, yeah, the one I didn't pay for!! Oops, I guess it was 12 items!! I loaded up the kids, parked closer, and ran back in to pay for it. The lady at the doors stopped me and I explained that I didn't have a return; I simply didn't pay for it in the first place! She laughed, and so did I.
I knew before I went back into Target the second time that it was 2:32. When I finally got to church it was 2:42. 12 minutes late. And not only that, the girls said they actually got back close to 20 after, so they'd been waiting twenty minutes or more for me. Ugh! Can't I just deduct the minutes from being early that morning and call it good? =)

Note to self (and husband): Find a babysitter next time!

Clean up!

2008-02-11T19:37:00.001-08:00

In the interest of coming up with a new blog, I decided to post others I had on myspace and other personal notes. Hope you enjoy these! Maybe it will give me some time to come up with new ones!

Wipe your spit on your shirt

2008-02-11T19:34:00.000-08:00

What not to say to your one year old. After eating a "turtle" he ripped out of the box, Owen was spitting out the nuts. I grabbed the trash can, and we managed to get the chunks in without fallout. Phew! Then, seeing the spit laden grubby paws and having no tissues within reach, I say, "Wipe your spit on your shirt." I must have missed the day in child psych when they tell you kids only hear the last part of what you tell them, because Owen looked down at his shirt and spit his chocolately chunky mouthful onto his shirt. Mmm mmm mmm. Hide the turtles better I guess. Or maybe THINK before you SPEAK?!?! I can smell the mother of the year award, it is close, real close...

WHAT I LEARNED FROM AN ORGANIZER

2008-02-11T19:22:00.000-08:00

(Since my husband got to go on 2 snowmobiling trips last year, I got to have a professional organizer come to my house, and this is what I learned.)

1. Store things in zones – e.g. Put your mixer in the bottom cupboard below your flour, sugar, etc.; put kid dishes in the lower cupboards so they can easily access them
2. Put things you use more often in front, things less often in back (or within arm’s reach for more often, higher up or further down for less often)
3. Organize books by subject (seems simple, but I have since tweaked this- now my books are in horizontal stacks on the shelves according to subject)
4. Keep surfaces clear
5. Group things in the area you use them (similar to #1, but more household/room oriented)
6. When things look nice, you’ll take care of it
7. When in doubt, throw it out!
8. Keep things to a minimum – How much do you REALLY need?
9. Fewer things are easier to keep clean (for me – this includes clothes!!)
10. Don’t take freebies!
11. Things used less often (once/twice a year) can be kept elsewhere (not in the area of use)
12. IF YOU DON’T LOVE IT, GET RID OF IT!

My 1st blog. Ever. And it's about ANTS?!?! (Jul 06, '07)

2008-02-11T18:00:00.000-08:00

I thought I would make my first blog very intellectual! Who let the ants in my house!?!? Why ants. Just when you think summer is great, you are reminded inside and out that how good your summer is depends on what kinds of bugs you encounter!! At least they move too fast for Owen to eat, so that is good. And speaking of Owen, he broke my printer. Guess I was too focused on the ants to notice him tearing the printer apart...

CRICKET & not Jiminy! (Aug 13, '07)

2008-02-11T15:07:00.001-08:00

I thought my next blog should follow suit with the insect theme. Who let more bugs in and where is that cricket anyway?!?! As soon as you think, Oh I hear it over here, there is silence, and you see nothing. At least I don't have brown recluse spiders!!! Sorry T! I will take my ants, crickets and mosquitos and the occasional brown spiders any day!

Creepy guy with a video camera (November 6, '07)

2008-02-11T15:05:00.000-08:00

You know, I wasn't going to blog this, but I think it will help me cope! Thursday evening, when my kids and I were leaving the convenience store, a guy was videotaping us. I didn't find this out until I was buckling in Owen and Grace said, "Mom, that guy's videotaping you." To which I said, "WHAT!??!" Yep, the guy in the van next to me was taping my backside putting my child in his carseat. Grace then said, "I saw him taping us as soon as we opened the door." Nice. Now I'm thinking he was taping us while we were in there eating, too, because he was parked in front of the big window. So, I get the kid in, close the door, and get in the driver's seat. I shoot this guy the look of death, and he backs out and tears out of the lot, not even stopping for the stop sign. Had my three year old been buckled in, I might have given chase. I wanted to, believe me. And, yes, I called the cops. I'm not banking on anything, though. Just keep your eyes out for a creepy older guy in an old blue minivan. As Grace put it, "I could tell he was bad because of his eyes." Psalm 91!

WHAT I LEARNED ON OUR TRIP TO TULSA

2008-01-19T11:14:00.000-08:00

(written in chronological order)

· DON'T STAY UP UNTIL 4 A.M. MAKING TRAVEL GAMES FOR YOUR KIDS WHEN YOUR HUSBAND IS BORROWING A TWO-SCREEN DVD PLAYER FOR WATCHING MOVIES.
· MAKE SURE YOU HAVE YOUR OWN ROAD ATLAS BEFORE YOU LEAVE.
· BEING A PASSENGER WHILE DRIVING IN FOG MAKES ME CARSICK.
· HOT CHOCOLATE & A GLAZED DONUT DON'T TASTE THAT BAD COMING UP (SEE ABOVE).
· JUST BECAUSE YOU SEE THE PERSON IN THE OTHER LANE DOESN'T MEAN THEY SEE YOU.
· NOT ALL GAS STATIONS OFF OF AN INTERSTATE ARE CREATED EQUAL.
· BRING THE COMPLETE FIRST AID KIT, IF YOU BRING IT, YOU WON'T NEED IT. IF YOU DON'T BRING IT, YOU'LL END UP BUYING MEDICAL SUPPLIES WHEN SOMEONE ENDS UP BLEEDING.
· DON'T BOTHER TAKING YOUR FAMILY TO A NEW RESTAURANT BECAUSE EVERYONE (INCLUDING YOUR HUSBAND) WILL ORDER THE EXACT SAME THINGS THEY WOULD AT MCDONALD'S.
· CHOCOLATE PECAN PIE IS WORTH STOPPING THE CAR FOR.
· DON'T LET YOUR HUSBAND HELP PACK THE KIDS' CLOTHES. EVEN IF YOU GIVE THEM A LIST AND HE JUST HAS TO CHECK THINGS OFF, STILL CHECK YOURSELF, NO MATTER HOW STRESSED OUT YOU ARE.
· YARD WORK IS OPTIONAL IN KANSAS – AT LEAST THE PART WE SAW.
· COFFEYVILLE, KS IS PART GHOST TOWN, LITERALLY. OH, AND AMAZON.COM IS THERE, TOO.
· OOLOGAH AND TALALA ARE REAL PLACES (NOT IN KS).
· BRING ALL YOUR VITAMINS, PRESCRIPTIONS, SUPPLEMENTS, ETC., WITH YOU – EVEN THE ONES YOU THINK YOU WON'T NEED. BECAUSE THOSE ARE THE ONES YOU DEFINITELY WILL NEED.
· DON'T PLAN ON ACTUALLY SLEEPING ON A TRIP WITH THE KIDS.
· YOU CAN NEVER HAVE ENOUGH CHOCOLATE WHEN YOUR SANITY IS AT STAKE.
· MAKE SURE YOU REALLY KNOW WHERE YOU ARE TRYING TO END UP BEFORE YOU PLAN YOUR ROUTE, ALTHOUGH THE SCENIC ROUTE IS KIND OF FUN.
· SODA POP MAKES KIDS CRAZY.
· IT SNOWS IN TULSA. AND PEOPLE FREAK OUT.
· SEEING 7 KIDS & 2 SHOPPING CARTS IS APPARENTLY A STRANGE PHENOMENON. BE PREPARED FOR QUESTIONS.
· TURNPIKES ARE FASTER, BUT YOU HAVE TO HAVE CHANGE TO USE THEM!
· SANTA HATS AT CHURCH ARE COMPLETELY INAPPROPRIATE.
· A LATE NIGHT SONIC RUN ON CHRISTMAS EVE MIGHT MEAN YOU HAVE TO DRIVE TO MORE THAN ONE BEFORE YOU FIND ONE THAT'S OPEN. AND YOU MIGHT WANT TO CHECK HOW MUCH MONEY YOU BROUGHT BEFORE YOU ORDER.
· DON'T LEAVE YOUR VALUABLES IN YOUR VEHICLE UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.
· ALWAYS CHECK YOUR KIDS' POCKETS BEFORE THROWING ANYTHING IN SOMEONE ELSE'S WASHING MACHINE. EVEN THOUGH YOU NEVER LET THEM HAVE GUM, THAT WILL BE THE TIME THEY HAVE SOME.
· BANGING ON THE PATIO DOOR IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT TO SCARE THE PEOPLE INSIDE IS NOT FUNNY. EVER.
· CROCS MAY NOT BE PRETTY, BUT THEY SURE ARE COMFORTABLE!
· CHILDHOOD MEMORIES GET FUNNIER WITH EACH TELLING.
· I LOVE PAINTING CERAMIC STUFF! (ALTHOUGH I PLANNED OUT THE ENTIRE DESIGN FOR MY COFFEE MUG AND THEN GOT THERE AND THEY WERE OUT OF MUGS, I STILL AM HOOKED!)
· NEW WIPER BLADES ARE AWESOME. ESPECIALLY AFTER TWO YEARS WITH ONES THAT DON'T WORK.
· FINDING A HOTEL ON THE FLY MAY NOT WORK FOR THE ANAL RETENTIVE PLANNERS, BUT IT MIGHT BE LESS WORK.
· CHECK THE WEATHER FORECAST FOR YOUR DESTINATION SO YOU DON'T WAKE UP SURPRISED. (IT'S PROBABLY A GIVEN THAT IT WILL SNOW IN IOWA DURING THE WINTER.)
· IT'S A GOOD IDEA TO PLAN TRAVEL AROUND PMS.

A DAY IN MY LIFE

2007-12-01T15:03:00.000-08:00

It’s 1:00 a.m. and I was finally getting to bed, or so I thought. As soon as I turned off the lights, I heard my three-year-old running down the hall crying. Did I really think that after almost two hours of trying to get the one-year-old to sleep that I could have A MOMENT TO MYSELF? A fitting ending to another day in my life…

I guess I should start with the night before, when my husband announced he wouldn’t be going to church in the morning because this will be the only day he can go hunting. Sure, whatever. Fast forward to my alarm clock beeping at 7 a.m. Usually not a problem to get up, but since I was up most of the night with a stuffed up nose, I hit snooze a few times. Ok, about five times. Everyone was now up and getting ready, so I got in the shower. Amazingly, the three-year-old knocked on the shower door to show me she was completely dressed (which was shortly after the one-year-old came in the shower with me). I thought we might have a fighting chance to get to church on time. After finding a “I have nothing to wear” jean skirt for my oldest daughter that she didn’t end up wearing after all, I found my matching sock in the dryer. They couldn’t be in the same load of laundry! (Why can’t they mate for life anyway?)

My four kids and I made it to church about 20 minutes late. My mascara’s smudged, but I hoped no one noticed with my glasses on. I was just glad I got any make-up on at that point, since I usually put on my make-up while my husband drives. Church went fairly uneventful, aside from leaving the service once to take the baby to the nursery and once to blow my nose. No wait, three times. I forgot to drop off a diaper with the kid, so I had to take that back to the nursery, too. When church was over, I took all the kids to Papa Murphy’s to get pizza, cheesy bread, and cookie dough. At four o’clock, we were scheduled to pick up grandpa and grandma’s puppy from the pet boarding place, so we went to their house to eat and hang out.

Being the good friend I am, earlier in the week I helped a friend bid on an item on ebay, as she had never done it before and did not have an internet connection. I didn’t realize that I would be at my parent’s house when the auction ended, but I figured that shouldn’t be a problem. After I put the pizza in the oven, I returned to my parent’s newly started-up computer and found that it didn’t recognize an internet connection. Hmm. I tried to call my dad’s cell phone in hopes that they are not in the airplane when I called, but, you guessed it, they were! Since I knew we had only about an hour, I racked my brain for where I could find a computer with internet that I could use somewhere in the city of Hutchinson on a Sunday at 12:30 p.m. I proceeded to look for a phone book — and look, and look, then give up and tell the kids we would have to finish their pizza when we get back from finding a computer somewhere in town. Before we left, I had the brilliant idea to put the remaining pizza back in the now turned off oven to keep warm while we are out. We loaded up everyone “as is” into the van and started our quest. First, I tried the coffee shop that I knew from my cell phone, and found out they are closed Sundays. (I keep a phone book in my vehicle for this purpose.) The library would be closed on a Sunday, too. I tried a hotel nearby, and they suggested another hotel. The second hotel told me I could use the one in their lobby, but I would have to leave if a hotel guest wished to use it. (Let’s hope no one there was planning on checking their email!)

Called my friend, bid on the item again. I reluctantly agreed to call her back when the auction was almost over. Generally this would not be a problem, only I wasn’t going to hang out with four semi-hungry kids in a hotel lobby for forty minutes. I decided to take them to the dollar store to get some things I needed to make Christmas gifts. As we drove down Main Street, I saw the new coffee shop was open, so I ran in to see if they have any computers. Good, now I could come back after we pick up our things and check on the ebay item – and get a decaf turtle mocha. When we got to the store, the one-year-old was asleep. Perfect. I needed some dead weight to lug around. I suggested coming back another day, but my three girls wouldn’t have it. A short lecture on behavior and a restatement of our mission, and we braved the dollar store.

Again, I thought I can do this; we were in and out of the store with only one blow pop per kid not on the list. Back in the van, with baby still asleep, I tried to get back to coffee shop in 7 minutes. At the lights I managed to get behind an old lady in her nice new car that must be reading the kilometers per hour instead of the miles per hour, because she was only going 15 mph. Main Street didn’t offer any opportunities to pass, so I kept telling her to hurry up, hoping that would help. She must have heard me, because now we were down to almost 10 mph, yes 10. (I basically had to tap the gas pedal every so often to keep moving.) She turned only a block before me and I raced to the coffee shop. I clicked the internet icon and waited while it was connecting. At least it told me it was connecting. I decided to order my drink while I waited, thinking then it would be up by the time I am done. Since turtle mocha was not on their menu, I tried to find something similar and then asked if they could just make one like that. I went back to check on the computer and then another gal said to me, “Ma’am, I’m sorry but our internet is down today.” (What!? Nice, well, my $4 coffee better be worth it.) I was now thinking of how to apologize to my friend that I missed the end of the auction, while the coffee girls were doing two drive-thru orders now instead of mine. I thought it was about time to check on my brood awaiting me in the van. I could see them through the window, but they couldn’t see me. Yep, I needed to get out there, mayhem was ensuing. But, I couldn’t leave without my coffee!!!

At least the coffee smelled good. The natives in the vehicle wanted to go back to grandma’s and finish eating and make the cookies we got. Sounded good to me! As soon as I took a sip of my coffee, I realized that I had forgotten to say DECAF when I ordered, so I basically threw away $4.26. (Can you tell I don’t order coffee that often?) The trip back to grandma’s wouldn’t have been complete without narrowly (emphasis on narrowly) missing a black lab running away from his kids and crossing the highway in front of us. Not only did the dog almost go to heaven, we almost hit the kid who wasn’t even close to catching the dog, but also still thought running out onto the highway in front of a moving vehicle was a good idea. I know now our seatbelts work pretty well, since we tested them twice within sixty seconds. We all were fine, except my purse that landed on the floor, along with all of its contents. It had to be sitting open on the seat next to me, because it wouldn’t be funny to just have to pick up the bag and not the one hundred and two things inside!

We got back in the house, I opened the oven to take out the pizza that I was hoping was still warm after we were gone a lot longer than I thought. It was still warm. Slightly burnt, but warm. I was not sure how an oven on the off position could stay so hot for so long, but I now know not to do that again. Because the pizza cheese wasn’t as appealing as before we left, the girls didn’t want it. Well, at least we could make cookies. (We each had to eat some dough, first.) I loaded up the pan with spoonfuls of dough, put them in the oven, and set a timer. Apparently, grandma needs a new timer, because no one heard it go off. Oh well, we didn’t really want to eat the cookies.

It wasn’t long until it was time to go pick up the puppy from the boarding place. We were all excited to go see the new puppy. On the way, I decided to get hot chocolate at Super America to make up for the disappointing coffee trip. One buck for the same size drink, nice. We got to the dog place a full five minutes early. For once! I saw the lights were on and I heard dogs barking, so I figured someone was inside. We all got out for the big event and walked up to the front door. Had the doors been unlocked, we could have actually gone inside. My kids were soon starting to get cold waiting outside, so we headed back to the vehicle. By now someone else had arrived to pick up their dog, so I was hoping to watch them and see where they went. But, they never got out of their car. Fifteen minutes after we arrived, a lady with a dog in her back seat pulled in the next driveway, so we thought this was it! A lady from the other car got out and started to go across the lot to the other side of the building. She told me to wait in front with my kids. (I assumed they would come around to the front to let us in.) So we waited. And waited. I finally gathered the troops and decided to go in this other building, too. We went in one door, and nobody was in there. So, we came back to the front and then saw the same lady coming out with her two dogs and the dog lady was with her. She asked if we were there to pick up a dog and we said “YES!” Now we are getting somewhere! Once we were in correct building (through a different door nonetheless), the lady assumed I owned the dog so she plopped him in my arms. I held him like a new dad holds a baby, only the puppy was crazy, scratching and licking me everywhere. I just wanted to get the dog and leave!

Our adventures were only half over at this point, but I didn’t know that yet. My parents returned from their trip, we ate supper, and went back to church for the evening service. Since I didn’t have a pen to take notes (because it was still on the floor of my van), I had to borrow one. Good thing I had remembered to bring something for the kids to do at grandma’s (not that we actually could have), because they needed something to keep them occupied during church. Well, the two older kids did anyway. The younger two went to their classes. And though both went into their classrooms, only one was willing to come out.

So, in order to get out of church with minimal on-lookers, I have to pass off the one-year-old baby boy to my eight-year-old so that I can carry my three-year-old girl out of her classroom and all the way to the van. Since there could be no better time to go grocery shopping, I decided to just get it over with. I chose the local grocery store instead of WalMart for the gas coupon I would get at the end of my shopping trip. Plus, the natural food section has better supplements which I needed more of to fight the cold I felt coming on. We found ourselves in the bulk foods, right next to the natural food section. After a couple bags of various snacks, I saw dried banana chips, put some in a bag and put them on the scale. Nothing happened. I tried a couple more times, still nothing. A stock boy happened in my direction and asked if I needed help with the machine and I said I did. He said the machine doesn’t register anything on the scale unless it weighs a certain amount. I guess my only option then was to dump some more in. Success. Or so I thought. All the time I was trying to get this figured out, my little guy was digging his grubby paws in every bin he felt like. Did I say he, too, had a cold? Yeah, I ran out of that section. After a few trips to the bathroom and criss-crossing the store trying to find stuff, the last thing we had to get was some cheese. Here, while we were trying to decide on which string cheese to get, we saw our pastor. Following a brief conversation, I noticed that the kids were just staring at him like, “You grocery shop?” Funny. (I just hoped at that point I didn’t look like the day I was having.)

We went to check out and forgot that we didn’t get the free item. I sent my eight year old to fetch the coupon again (we managed to lose the first time around), and the item. She brought it, but it was the wrong size, so the checkout lady offered to go get the correct one for me. Bless her heart! In the meantime, the cashier behind us offered the kids suckers, and at 8:30 p.m. I said, “I’ll put them in my pocket, thank you.” I packed up the groceries, paper cut my finger on one of the bags, and completely ignored the four kids who are now playing in the carts (the kind you “drive”).

I looked at the receipt and realized I was pretty close as far as the budget went for this trip, so I better make this stuff last. I loaded up the back end of the van, got everyone in and headed for home. Then I remembered that I got out the receipt not to see if I was on budget or not, I got it out to get the gas coupon because I needed to get gas! Oops. We were only about three miles or so out of town, so we turned around. There was some screaming and crying involved at this point, but mostly from me.

I got to the station, pulled out my card to swipe, but realized that I couldn’t use the gas coupon unless I went into the store and paid for the gas. Ugh. (I guess we need rules. But, why can’t they have a scanner out at the pump, so one could scan the coupon and not have to go in?)

The way home was rather quiet. Most of them fell asleep, although I wanted to be. When we got home, I brought in a few things from the front seat and went back for the bags of groceries in the back. At least that was what I thought I was going back for. But, since someone had woken up the little boy sound asleep in his carseat, he was now screaming. I decided that nothing in the van was worth a crying child (and my patience), so I tried to get him to go back to sleep and left the stuff out there.

Turned out that my oldest daughter brought in all the groceries, shut the back door of the van, and put away all of the food, too. Whoa! I was floored. The baby didn’t go back to sleep, but at least I didn’t have to do the groceries after all. Hallelujah!

I sat down on the couch and saw that I had missed the Extreme Makeover Home Edition show that was taped in MN, and was the 100th episode. Bummer. Maybe if I hadn’t gotten groceries, I could have been home to watch it. (Maybe I can still catch it on the internet?) I just knew there was something I wanted to get home for, but I couldn’t recall what it was. Maybe it was because I had Milk Duds for breakfast.